Saturday, March 29, 2014

Someone Your Own Size



War is a bitch.  I have a long time friend in Eve who claims that highsec wars are the main driving factor thats holding back the game's growth.  I don't know if I'd be that dramatic about it myself.  I do have to agree that a fat lot of the guys who participate in highsec wardecs are the same type of players who will say your crying and beg for more tears if you try to negotiate an end to the war. They simply don't purport themselves with the same nobility and regal fibre as me and my piratical kin.  Now I don't mean men like Psychotic Monk, or Cannibal Kane who do bring unrivaled class and professionalism to the stars when I say this.  No, I mean the men who wardec anything that undocks from the SOE epic arc station and then proceeds to hellcamp Jita, Amarr or Rens with neutral logi and all manner of boorish tactics.  I'm sure you're familiar.  I do not say all this to bash on the highsec griefer's style of life of course, or even to boast about lowsec superiority.  I say all this to introduce us to our next victims.

When 7-2 began wardeccing the locals in our new deployment region with the intent to fight under gate guns a few other groups joined in.  Either hired mercenaries who decced us seperately or opportunistic carrion who hopped on the same dec as allies.  I believe our friends were of the latter.  They were from a corp named S-o-S and at the time they were allianceless.  After my run in with the group of wartargets who crashed my Kronos execution I went on a bit of a research binge to go after the bastards.  I spent the better part of a Saturday perusing Evewho and compiling a list of possible bogeys, yet by the time I was done the men responsible for my flub had largely logged off.  Bastards.  That left me and my friends from S-o-S.  A few quick locators later and I had eyes on.  My alt followed a small frigate fleet of theirs through lowsec a few jumps and then into Stacmon.  There they sat and warped from gate to gate catching Brave Newbies who didn't know any better and violencing them with a prejudice.  I wasn't particularly impressed.  Now don't get me wrong I will gladly shoot a Brave Newbie Venture in lowsec just as quickly as the next guy.  But I also like to think there is more... ugh I hate to say honour but I guess that's the best word; more honour in a lowsec slaughter than there is in deccing a corp known for being newbs (its in their name dammit), and camping the choke point to their home system just to kill a few Hoarders with 236 Tritanium and 58 Small Tungsten charges in the hold.

So I came up with my own boorish plan.  It was rather obvious that they had scouts in the surrounding systems and when a WT showed up in local somewhere they'd all swarm the gate and hit him with sticks after he jumped.  Well, all I needed was an anti-frig Vexor (I can buy that), a WT symbol (got that), and some piss and vinegar (got that too).  It was rather impressive really, how quickly they moved to my gate once I jumped into the neighboring system.  They clearly had done this before.  I jumped into Stacmon, my imaginary long blonde hair billowing in the wind behind me.  There they sat, eager and grinning like a bundle of half-witted Cheshire cats waiting to eat their mouse.  And I'd like to think I played the part well. I held cloak for as long as I could and decloaked burning back to the gate Feigning Disorder until they all engaged.

Cry havoc. Said he who fought chaos with chaos, and let slip the dogs of war.

Small neutron blasters spooled up and a flight of angry Hobgoblins flew forth.  Dual webs and a solid scram held down my unfortunate colleagues whilst I pummeled them into the dirt.  They simply didn't stand a chance.

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

A New World


Jumping into Teon I knew what was going to happen.  I paid off the Concord guy just like I was supposed to.  I knew my record now said I was a reformed and forgiven scoundrel welcomed back into high society.  Still I winced a bit, expecting the warning lights and screaming officers who always demand I leave or be shot down.  Yet the only sound that fell upon my ears was silence; disturbing, peaceful silence.  So I went on my way.

For years the only times I had intentionally set foot in highsec with Damay was in a gank Thrasher/Catalyst.  Times change however and here I was.  A few wardecs and a need for new scenery made up my mind. Before I knew it I was revoking my badge of -10 honor for a few hundred million isk and some metal trinkets.

The goal was, at first, to find a shiny mission ship and taunt it with my lowly Arbitrator until it decided to hit me.  Well it didn't take too long for someone to oblige.  I convo'd the poor individual and asked a fair ransom for the safe release of their vessel.  The exchange went like this:


[15:11:22] EVE System > Channel MOTD: This is a Ransom. Turn off all mods and stop your ship. Terms for your release will be discussed momentarily.
[21:14:47] Gadgett Hackwrench > ?
[21:14:52] Damay Aprionati > this is a ransom
[21:15:00] Damay Aprionati > 2.5billion and ill let you go
[21:15:05] Gadgett Hackwrench > wut?
[21:15:10] Gadgett Hackwrench > fu
[21:15:15] Gadgett Hackwrench > mi shit costs less
[21:15:18] Gadgett Hackwrench > *my
[21:15:20] Damay Aprionati > alright
[21:15:30] Damay Aprionati > lets negotiate
[21:15:42] Gadgett Hackwrench > but i'll set reward for u, at2.5 billion
[21:16:31] Damay Aprionati > hows about this
[21:16:34] Damay Aprionati > ill scan your ship
[21:16:44] Damay Aprionati > and give you a fair ransom price
[21:17:02] Gadgett Hackwrench > have 100kk
[21:17:12] Gadgett Hackwrench > so u can scan whatever u want
[21:17:26] Damay Aprionati > all you have is 100k isk?
[21:17:33] Gadgett Hackwrench > yeap
[21:17:40] Gadgett Hackwrench > at this mient
[21:17:44] Gadgett Hackwrench > moment
[21:18:27] Damay Aprionati > very well
[21:18:43] Gadgett Hackwrench > ok
[21:18:57] Gadgett Hackwrench > 2.5 billion for your head)
[21:19:00] Gadgett Hackwrench > have this)
[21:19:07] Gadgett Hackwrench > it will be funny)
[21:20:13] Damay Aprionati > Pith B-Type X-Large Shield Booster
[21:20:16] Damay Aprionati > dropped
[21:21:29] Gadgett Hackwrench > just enjoy the game for 2 days)
[21:21:41] Gadgett Hackwrench > and i'll set reward) it's not hard for me
[21:21:45] Damay Aprionati > well sir this is not my first rodeo
[21:21:59] Gadgett Hackwrench > and no my first
[21:22:10] Gadgett Hackwrench > i like to fuck guys like u
[21:22:14] Gadgett Hackwrench > u cfme
[21:22:19] Damay Aprionati > im sorry for you to have lost the ship that way
[21:22:21] Gadgett Hackwrench > sole my loot
[21:22:25] Gadgett Hackwrench > *stole
[21:22:31] Gadgett Hackwrench > no
[21:22:33] Damay Aprionati > id have much rather come to an agreement
[21:22:46] Gadgett Hackwrench > i'll sorry u only when u die)
[21:23:15] Gadgett Hackwrench > and i will be a good price for idiot like u
[21:23:20] Gadgett Hackwrench > *it
[21:23:40] Damay Aprionati > no need for name calling
[21:23:48] Damay Aprionati > we fought, i offered ransom and you lost
[21:24:25] Gadgett Hackwrench > do u know what happens with guys like u in real life?
[21:24:35] Damay Aprionati > no i honestly dont?
[21:24:39] Damay Aprionati > care to inform me
[21:24:48] Gadgett Hackwrench > so, i'll make your game funny here
[21:25:37] Damay Aprionati > im not sure i understand how your going to do that
[21:25:53] Damay Aprionati > nor do i understand what you think will come of me in real life?
[21:26:40] Gadgett Hackwrench > many peole will like to get money from ur headhunt)
[21:26:54] Gadgett Hackwrench > so... fuck off and enjoy
[21:27:02] Damay Aprionati > what does that have to do with my real life?
[21:27:21] Damay Aprionati > damnit

Sadly, OP has not delivered.

After my initial success I spent another few days popping MTU's and harassing locals to no avail.  Then I found it, a Kronos.  Oh this beautiful Kronos was simply begging to die in a fire.  I scanned it out with my alt and they had all sorts of shinies fitted and they used T1 drones and had a few mission boat losses and were unnamed and... Refusing to shoot me.  Balls.  I was determined though, so when they warped to station I followed, when they docked I waited, and when they undocked I moved closer.  And when they shot me I FREAKED the fuck out.

I flew in close, got my orbit straight and went to work on the drones.  Web, scram and TD's light up and turn off their MJD cycle.  I ask on comms the whole while how big of a drone bay I was dealing with and begging for all the luck the mighty Pirate Gods could grant me.  The Yars on High had forsaken me though.  I hadn't seen a single one of our wartargets yet since the start of the conflict, yet here they all came now as the last drone of the Marauder popped.  3 T3's, a Guardian, a Curse and some other not so fun ships were here for me.  I had to run before they closed to point range, cursing the whole way.  The Kronos docked of course and went away.

I wanted blood from these damn deccers now, I was done with small fries for the time being....