A What?

Sir, the onboard AI heralded in its odd semi-feminine voice D-scan is picking up a Procurer class mining vessel within 12AU of your current position.

"What the fuck?" Damay exclaimed bolting upright from his reclined position in the Rifter.  He had been burning towards nothing for the past 5 minutes waiting out GCC and enjoying the view of the Loes star system's Orange Radiant.  At the call of a possible miner in system he perked right up and prepped the ship.

He simultaneously set all of his tackle modules to overheat and frantically tried to narrow the D-scan down to a specific belt. "Please baby, please be that stupid,"

Target localized to Belt I-I, Sir.

He was in warp before she/it finished. "Sweetheart if he's in there and within scram range I'll kiss your motherboard,"

That won't be necessary, Sir

As he dropped out of warp there the mining vessel sat, right at zero on the warp-in just as Damay had hoped.  Point. In one volley the ship's shields disappeared, four more than the satisfying white flash of destruction filled Damay's visual scanners.  "Looks like I owe you a kiss babe," He mumbled at the lifeless AI that was his only companion for roams such as these while he opened comms with the previous Procurer Pilot to ransom the man's pod.

"How much is this pod worth to ya son?"
"I'm not sure I understand the question," Damay couldn't help but chuckle at that response, knowing full well now how this ransom would end.
"Alright let me be more clear, I'll take 20mil to let your pod go free.  You have ten seconds."
"Well that's easy enough, fire away,"

Sir, you don't really plan on kissing my motherboard do you? You understand the ramifications of such actions could result in personal injury to yourself and hardware damage to my circuitry and...

 The AI continued to list plenty of good reasons not to kiss energized gear as Damay walked over to the panel that hid all of her inner workings singing "Blah blah blah pucker up beautiful,"

http://r1fta.killmail.org/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=13852022